B R O K E

I'm annoucing to everyone tt i'm broke! i left $2 for the rest of the whole month!how am i suppose to eat my lunch?hmm everyday 50 cents?*let me count how many days i've left with this month* about 2 days more? tml i'm not working, so i'm able to yah SURVIVE! hahaha*giggles*

B R O K E I A M

I noe i'm still owning many pple their christmas presents, i apologise to all tt i owe. Sorry sorry, but i'm seriously broke and i have about $627 to pay up to pple, i'm in DEBT. Depression takes the better of me!

...Depression ..*sigh sigh*

today i was suppose to work half day, and i was doing registration for refraction clinic patients, and in the morning it was all follow up cases and it was really easy, but in the morning there are about 9 new cases and in tt situation, i'll haf to do more work! yups, so staff nurse Rugayah wanted me to stay in the afternoon to hands on, * tink tink tink ( more money rolling into my pocket)* but, i'll haf to pay lots of things, hp bills, internet bills, my bus fare, my food, the debt, etc etc...*nv ending*..sigh sigh..

well guess wat?my frend christina teo her youngest daughter is born on the same day as me, same month, same yr and the same hospital!*wowow!!!!*

amazing isn't it?i'm was so surprised, haha and she was saying tt im able to be her daughter already!hahahaa*yawns*


today helped up in alot of things, everyone is asking me to do things for them, esp rugayah, she asked me go collect the papers, while i was doing things halfway. Eariler in the morning, she asked me to go into all the rms to write dwn the dates tt the doctor block!y can't she do it herself?i was also in the midst of doing sumthing!then later ask me to take over her powerpt job!*wah piang*, suddenly i feel like a coffee girl/should i say office girl!*irritated*.started my chopping of "specialist clinic E" onto all the continuous sheet, did about 16 pad. Also helped dawn to cut the paper pasted on cardboard tt states, "manifest refraction", " fogging refraction", " I.O.P ( airpuff)", and more which i cannot remember!then later in the evening i did the taping of tape on it, so tt it looks like laminated effect.yups!

so you tell me wat kinda job is this?not complaining, but the job scope is getting me confuse now. *sigh* after christmas n the new yr, it will be a horrible month!, cos More patients will b seeing the doc, and i'll be assisting YMPor in the morning! and tt will be E1. Meaning tt there is a risk of wrapping up children and grabbing them to stop their rejection of the doctors to examine their eyes. Another words a "force examination" yup!kinda cruel but it's a must. Another thing is tt my ears are going to be deaf soon! After one incident tt the boy screamt at my ear, kinda deaf on my left ear. yups! Damn it, it's so ironic, in the hospital you make pple feel well and healthy again, but apparently the patients tt are coming are making the healthy nurses and SCAs like me sick and have more illnesses and problems with our health!! it's such and oxymoren thing! *Oh goodness*


tell me about it man!*shaking my head*haiz, my eyes cannot take it anymore, i didn't haf any nap, need to go sleep now! gd nite everyone! love you all!*muacks*

Today there was multitudes of patients! and so are the case sheet! Carol kept on passing the case notes to me and telling me tt she will be back to come back to collect the case sheets but in the end, she didn't at all! well she was taking care of all those ROP babies..she have to wrap them up and the dr will put a spectulum on the eyes to open their eyes and check, cos they will not co-operate besides these babies are all normally premature.Yeah not tt bad lah, cos we will give them the drops to numb their eyes so tt they will nt feel so much pain in their eyes when the dr do a check up on them. Today i was so busy tt LinLee ( a Dr from Aust. with another dr by the name of Joanna. Both of them are actually orthopmetrist--where they check children eyes sight from the age of 4 and below.) Actually have to help me with the filing and all those, w/o his help, i will be boar by now hahahahaa, cos it's really stressful to see so many case notes in one day. Patients kept asking me when will it be their turn and they come running to me one after another!


my nurse manger came to my rescue, she actually asked all those Drs who could help me take over the case sheets and so tt my room will not be choked up with case notes and also to stop patients from complaining. Hope today didn't haf any complains. Dr Garcia and Dr morgan had to take sum of the case sheets to see also. And all of them went back to their respective rooms, then came 2 ladies tt asked me when will their child's turn come, and i said hold on let me check, wah piang it was horrible running from one room to another! and ended up knowing tt it was all at dr morgan rm..*phew*..wat a relief!..*sigh* anyway, tt's about my day lah, nth much but only had to work my guts out..and suffered a mild gastric today.


for my church, everything is not running smoothly, my jie just left church and now our church lessen one person! *sigh* she was the only one close to me in church n now she is gone! there is no1 i can turn to now, wendy is now in aust and once wendy left, our ministry became like tt...*sigh sigh*..well gt a feeling when wendy comes back, nth will be left? im really feeling uncertain! originally our whole team form A SWATCH but now,A- abriel S-sarah(gone) W-wendy(in aust only be back in june),A-Anastasia(no more in the team),T- tiffany(just left church), C-carlise(half helping) and H-humin...can you see wat is left?basically nothing!! everything and all those nice memories tt our team created is all gone. No wonder i felt weird when my jie was like telling me where are the things kept! so tt sunday was the last day!..*sigh*..


wat can i do?2-3 yrs back, i tired my best to ask her to stay on and she did..was really happy thot this issue was over, but to my surprise she brought it up again n this time she left w/o turning back...

To Tiffany Jie
if you're reading this:

hey jie thanks for all those times when i really needed u and you was there for me. You gave me the confidences in believing in myself and assured me from time to time again tt God will always be there for help me and He is just a prayer away. All my art gifts were well appreciated by you and often had ur praises, asking me to continue to make those gifts. Ur spirit of learning had given me loads of strength to be always having the attitude of learning. Thank you for letting me learn so much from you. I wanna tell you tt you had always been a role model to me!
though it saddens me having to think tt i can't be sitting beside you during sermons, but i still noe tt when our church is listening to RGT preach you will also be listening to the pastor at ur new church too!..no more vandalising on ur paper anymore. It really feels cold when no1 is sitting beside me, suddenly i feel as if i'm left in the cold wilderness again..no1 to accompany and to smile and laugh with me anymore..


thank you for the multitudes of gifts tt you have given to me. Each and every gifts will be well treasured by me and the times with memories tt we shared! Thank you for also opening up urself to me with ur life experiences and telling me things tt were so confidential. Im really honoured and glad tt i haf you as my jie and you noe wat?you will always be my jie!No 1 can replace you in my heart!!I hope tt when you're free we can meet up sum times yeah?n we will keep in contact on msn, emails and smses..yeah!..No worries..ur secrets with me will forever b a secret!nth will be leak! promise!!* gou gou shou*..yeah!!..


i hope you will make new and better frends in ur new church and hope to bum into you sum day okay?all the best in watever you do!thank you once more for the plenty tt you did for me!..i will carry all those with me for life and will always haf you as a jie!!love you!!*muacks muacks and hugs hugs *


tt's all for now!!*wipe tears*..take care!!

yet another day of boredem!!!went to work today!well i thot i was late but guess wat?it was my watch tt was fast!and i wasn't late at all!!!!!!..*chay chay*
hahahaha..silly me..today i assisted dr Garcia..again..i was supposed to do the counter but then, not enough pple so i had to assist her instead,well quite comfortable assisting her, she is a very nice Dr i must say, yeah!..at least she toks to me(esp when we haf loads of free time and like no patients)..i would often ask her things and tok about her past experiences. Though i haf lots to learn and i sumtimes dun understand her due to her thick essense of philippines..yeah..but will ask her..sumtimes i find tt i ask her too many questions!..haha..nevertheless, the lesser you ask, the lesser knowledge you noe..


today gt one follow up cases then Dr Garcia actually finish 90% of her patients already, but at the last min she had another one, cos it was jammed up at rm E4 which is the opthometrist..yeah..so at about 12+ then i gt the case sheet..wah piang..i already ended the consult machine and kept everyting in place, and now i had to take everything out again!!!..and guess wat?in the end, she didn't haf to use them at all...haiz..and i gt put them all back!!!!*grrrr*...wah piang..i wanted to bang my head against the wall..today lucky worked half day..packed everything back AGAIN and headed home..


took about an hour to reach home and i was so hungry, gt changed had my face washed and munched on my sausage muffin tt i asked my dad to get from macs in the morning!!..yeah was craving for it sound like a pregnant woman??
always having cravings for no rhythm or reason..
the muffin had alot of burn parts and i was so angry!!cos those burn parts are cancer causing...
oh well, hunger gt over me, had them all eaten in my tummy!
ate 2 sweet potatoes n had a cup of cold water ( for lunch)..then i had my afternoon nap
at about 4+ was awoken by my nice mummy..she's always doing tt, nv gibing me enough rest, waking me up at the wrong time!!*eeeee*...


oh well..gt up and had dinner about 6+ yeah..and then watched tv until about 10, had my bathe and here i am!!..haix...wat a hectic day i had.though work wasn't tiring, but it's getting boring to me..yeah!but i'm still very reluctant to work at the front counter, cos i'll meet alot of funny parents tt make sum stupid small minute matter into a big HOO HA!!eee..can't take it!!well, but i can sniff my days of misery is coming..!!haiz!!..


MISERY ARRIVING IN


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haben been blogging for quite awhile already..*Sigh sigh*..
i dunno y i dun feel really gd today, not in mental or emtionally but physcially!!!!..
my whole body feels sick!!!..after the fever...everything is like not gd..
today my head was spinning and i had lost all appetite to eat...
since yesterday it was like tt..my mummy said it might had been tt i nv slept well last night..
i tried to haf an afternoon nap...but i just woke up and gt worse...
i felt so nauseas...
really it felt like i'm suffering from sum motion sickness..
at work i'm also not hungry during lunch..i dun feel like eating...
my tummy is not hungry at all...but i feel tt my head spins...
i dun like the feeling really.....
it's making me feel really SICK!!!!...


didi also had been working so hard till she fall sick..
silly girl still say she very strong..also in the end fall sick..still say me wor...
aiyo..girl ar..pls ar..must take care okay?
drink lots of water and rest more...yeah???
dun everyday anyhow think and stress urself up till you gt no space to breathe and enjoy life..
work is work..but when it's time to rest pls do rest yeah??
dun cos of family problem then dun care about health..think this way..w/o health how can you work?right??
so must guai stay home rest ar..okay???
dun make all of us worry for you already okay??


han han..you also must be strong okay?remember to eat ur veges ar..can stay strong n healthy to like watch out for didi..okay??it must had been hard on you to accompany her to find her jobs..well make sure she rest more okay??dun let her worry so much..yeah??
so all in all...you also must tc of urself yah..!!*hugs n kisses*...hope to Bum into you soon!!..hahahaa...
*winks*...


tt's all for now pa...

well..currently not at home instead i'm at my cousin's house..well i'm really feeling bored..guess wat?i'm not feeling any better..i'm coughing like no1's business..actually didn't want to attend my grandma's bday dinner..well yeah gt forced by my mother and besides i had a quarral wif her again..well wat's new right?always quarralling..


told didi everything n instead kanna from her..wat rubbish nehs..haiz..well i guess from today onwards i'll haf to be strong and be independent..*signs* monday i'll haf to work again..nth new la huh..start finding my case notes and giving all the appointment cards and blah blah all the rubbish la..hope by monday i'll be feeling really better..hope i dun cough as bad as today..today my fever went up again so see pa...really hope tt i wun had to take a blood test really painful though...had it twice..dun wan anymore already..hahahaha...


frankly speaking i duno hw long i can last like really..had not been in a gd mood aways..mood had been swinging frm one end to another..sheesh man!!...*rolls away*..hahahaha...nth reallyt much to say pa..yeah..okay i shall log off and let my cousin use it le..toodles..

sick sick sick..today sick until cannot sick..since yesterday..after coming back from the chalet, i was suffering from a fever..burning at a temperature of 37.7..then took my mummy's fever medicine..then slept and felt better..slept very early but in the morning woke up many times..awhile hot and awhile cold..feel so uncomfortable..cannot sleep properly..
then at the chalet..we didn't really do anything..just acting like pigs..everyday eat and lie dwn on bed..when it come to the afternoon..all of us fall asleep..especially me cos i haf to wake up early to go work wor..yeah..so very tired..hahhahaa....well..yeah..dun really want to go into details pa..yeah..i slept wif my mummy, my dad and kor slept together..yeah...probably tt's how i caught my sickness from..my mummy hahaha..oh well...yeah..
on the last day, we headed to the new park tt changi beach club open to the public..really nice, cos it's early in the morning, the mist and the cold air is just so fresh and nice..hahaha..yeah..anyway..after when walking back, i feel like i'm really sick..yeah..the fever feeling...whole body no strength at all..cannot carry things properly..well only in the night i confirmed tt i had fever, then the nxt morning took temp again, a rise in temp, this time is burning at a temp of 38.5..went to the clinic..be4 tt at 8 i called my work place to inform them tt i wouldn't be coming to work..then..yeah..then headed to clinic..wah piang..the no was 3 and my no was like 16..piang..waited for 1 hour 30 mins lorh..and when doc see me..my temp went up again..burning at 39.2 can..wah piang..wait any longer..i sure die le lah..doc said tt if my fever dun go dwn by monday i'll have to go back to her to take my blood test..but really thank God tt my fever went dwn to 37.1 this evening yeah..after scraping my back..i was screaming man..really pain pain..hahaha..but all better now, can sleep better now...yeah..today practically slept the whole day man..after taking medicine, slept until 12..then after 12, had lunch..and slept again...until about 4.50..yeah...really slept the whole day..yeah..tt;s about wat happened today..funny tt my medicine nv take place..
oh..also had been coughing alot..my whole family is sick...my brother is on the road to recovery...my mother is coughing like me also..dad suffering from flu..to prevent from the outbreak of flu..he is taking medicine to stop the flu from getting worse..yeah...


oh wat a 3 days can bring my family into..haiz..okay..well i shall wait for didi to call me..toodles to all...*hugs*..no kisses cos my germs can just spread..hahahaha.....

well started work already, from the 1st to the 3rd december, i worked full day.
first 2 days are my training days where i'll haf to study..sigh damn dry and boring,but still i made it thru lah..yeah..okay..then the 3rd day which is yesterday, i fighted a "war" well tt's wat my trainer told me, in the morning, we had aout 20 over patients, and in the after, continue the war, we had almost nearing 30 patients..well i'm attached to my trainer..she is so sweet and nice..heehee..cute girl girl..well cannot call her girl nehs, she married and with 2nd child. Quite poor things though cos she just came back from maternity leave of 3 mths and yah, she lost touch of alot of things and haf to teach me summore..hahaha..well all in all, she is darn nice...


well i was very fortunate, cos consultant A.chia got a promotion, and so we all gt treat from her, we had canidian pizza..yeah..hahaha..my trainer said..it's as if they are celebrating for me..haha..or so call a welcome party lah..ahaha..yeah..well anyway..in the afternoon there is another doc tt is darn fierce, my trainer says alot of things tt other doc does, she dun do, she so quai bi qi one..*dun like her..so fierce*..eeee...hahaha...yeah..okay my trainer's name is call ginny..yeah..then she was telling me parents tt are always full of nonsense they always call them F parents.hahhahaha..cute way..kkh always gt alot of short terms and guess wat?i gt to go for course wor..hahahhaa..*shake heads*..


yeah..my nurse manager(NM) is on leave until the 10th dec..yeah..so only can get to see her by then le lah..well monday i sure darn tired one..work full day, and i cannot return home summore, going to changi beach club for my family's chalet..haiz..so ma fun, told my mother i dun go on monday but i'll go on tues and wed..cos tt both days i work half day..yeah..but then my insistent mother of mine wants me to go..oh well..yah..so..yah lah...


..........dun wanna say anything about today...........
wish to not noe anything and wish to forget everything.....
just no mood for everyting..............


























dun wan explaination